National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day

Go here for more info http://www.october15th.com/.

Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. It is a day that brings to the front of every one's mind all the babies that are lost every year. I remember EVERY DAY!

There is not a day that goes by that I do not think about my angels that should be in my arms instead of in my heart. Not a day goes by that I do not at some point think about what should have been, instead of what is. I miss all 4 of them every minute of every day.

I think of the hugs I do not feel. The kisses, the "I love you mommy" that I do not get to hear. I just get to imagine what it would be like to hear and feel those things. I Lost 4 pregnancies WAY to early, along with many women out there today. Today I think of you, I think of me, and I think of all our angels that will remain in our hearts forever!

Tonight, join the wave of light and light a candle from 7:00 pm - 8:00 pm. My candle will burn in loving memory of my 4 angel babies and yours. Gone TOO SOON and MISSED MORE THEN WORDS CAN EVER SAY!

Please join me.

Things are not always as they seem

Sorry I have been bad about writing lately. Nothing much has been going on and I have not been feeling very inspired. Yesterday I woke up and my back started hurting BAD!!!! It is still pretty BAD today. So I am back to laying on the couch and watching TV. I haven't been on the computer too much.

Last night I was watching Jo.n and K.ate plus 8 and the whole situation that they have just makes me real sad for the children. I learned a lesson though. When I first started watching I was jealous. Not that they have 8 children 6 of which they had at the same time because that has to be a hard road to go but because they tried fertility treatments and it worked right away for them. Why could that not happen for me? Not only did they get twins the first time but then had 6 more (again I do not want 6 at the same time). I wondered what I had to do just to have one. Even though it was hard they seemed happy. Now I watch and I just feel bad. It is hard to believe that last year I was watching them get remarried in Hawaii and this year they are divorced. Who is paying the price? The children will. I come from a divorced family and it is not and easy road. Then not to mention it is all being played out on TV. They have to watch bad things being said about their mom on TV. I mean they probably are not seeing it right now but some day they will see it.

When it first started, I was really late to the drama. I think it had been going on for 3 months before I even knew what was going on. At first, I was on Jo.n's side. I mean she was not a very nice person and I always wondered why he put up with it. But as time has gone on and I saw his most recent interview where he spent the entire time talking bad about the mother of his children on national TV all was done for me as far as he goes. My dad used to do the same thing to my mom. He would talk bad about my mother to us all the time. My mother never said anything bad about my dad...NEVER! Not until we were much older and had figured it out for ourselves. Well it back fired on my dad because I have not spoken to him in 15 years. Not because of that but because he is crazy but him talking about my mother never sat well with me and only made me feel bad for my mom.

Anyway, I guess it just goes to show that you never know what is going on in peoples lives. On the outside they can look like they have everything you want. Family, money, etc. But really what they don't have is one of the most important things we all seek...Happiness. I may not have 8 children, or even 1, but with DH I am always happy and I know I am loved.

GREAT DEAL

Go here http://www.freeopks.com/and sign up.  You can get 10 OPK or 10 Pregnancy tests or a combination of both for FREE!!!!!

Hurry! I do not know how long it will last.

YAWN!!!!

YAWN!!! I'm here but have not been writing too much. Things in my life are pretty boring! I guess boring is better then bad but it does not make for a good blog. It has been very rainy and ugly. I love fall but not if it is going to be like this. We hardly got any rain all summer but now it seems to be making up for it.

I did get some good news today. We had applied for hardship assistance from our mortgage company and today they called to let us know that they approved us for a unemployment forbearance. Basically they are going to let us pay 244.00 a month through February and then I can call them in February and see where we are and what we can do at that time. If I am back to work then we will work out a payment plan to pay back what we currently owe them. The good thing is that I will not be racking up more payments starting with this month through Feb. They will just consider the 244 as our payment.We still owe them 4000 but at least we have bought some time and it is a lot better then a lot of people I know that have not had such luck with their mortgage company. So that definitely took a load off my mind for a while.

Other then that I really have NOTHING going on and no progress being made on the baby front. I hope everyone has a great weekend!

An Award!

Thanks to Melissa for this award!









Here are the rules
1. you can only use one word!
2. pass this along to 6 of your favorite bloggers
3. alert them that you have given them this award!
4. have fun!

The Fun Part

1. Where is your cell phone? table
2. Your hair? short
3. your mother? strong
4. Your father? a@$hole
5. Your favorite food? ribs
6. Your dream last night? crazy
7. Your favorite drink? coke
8. Your dream/goal? baby
9. What room are you in? living
10. Your hobby? couponing
11. Your fear? alone
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? family
13. Where were you last night? home
14. Something that you aren’t? patient
15. Muffins? chocolate
16. Wish list item? Wii
17. Where did you grow up? Michigan
18. Last thing you did? shopped
19. What are you wearing? pj's
20. Your TV? on
21. Your pets? three
22. Friends? many
23. Your life? blessed
24. Your mood? calm
25. Missing someone? Katie Jo
26. Vehicle? minivan 
27. Something you’re not wearing? socks
28. Your favorite store? Target
29. Your favorite color? red
30. When was the last time you laughed? today
31. Last time you cried? 2 days ago
32. Your best friend? sis
33. One place that I go to over and over? online
34. One person who emails me regularly? MIL
35. Favorite place to eat? home



I nominate: Hmmm so hard to choose...I love you all!


Sunny in Seattle

In Due Time

Life and Love in the Petri Dish

I am Stacey's Blog

An Unwanted Path

Infertility Rocks

Another pet gone. :(

One of my birds died on Friday. :( I wasn't a big fan of the birds. We have had several birds and they all died fairly quickly. I would like one that talks. We had one that talked a long time ago but because we over heated teflon in one of our pans the bird breathed it in and died. We did not know teflon was deadly. After that we have had 4 different parakeets. I did not want the last 2 that we have but they were my niece's and she was moving and could not take them with her, so we took them. They were OK. Because there was 2 of them they kept each other company and did not want to be bothered by us humans. Well, Thursday night DH was talking to them and said to me that the boy did not look well. He was losing his feathers. The next day he was gone. I am sad now. I feel bad for the other bird because that was her buddy. I imagine she is going to be incredibly lonely now. We have been paying a lot of attention to her lately but she does not really like it. I don't know...we are not having much luck with animals lately. Maybe my other animals should run far away from us. :(

I had lunch with a friend on Friday. We don't get to see each other much but it is so nice when we do. She came over and had lunch here. She used to live here. We bought the house from her. I spent all day Thursday cleaning because I always feel like the house should be xtra clean for her since this used to be her house. It was a very nice visit.

Friday night my sis brought the kids over and DH watched them while her and I did another round of double coupon shopping at Kmart. Which we both did even better this time. No.ah who is normally a little leary of dogs has become completely crazy over Sammy. DH said all he wanted to do was pet him all the time. Then yesterday my sis called me and said that Noah had been yelling my name into a fake phone and she figured maybe to get him to stop he could really talk to me. He got on the phone and his first thing was, "Is Sammy good?". Every time I talk to him that is one of his first questions. It is so cute.

I was thinking last night that I do not want my nephews to grow up. Talking to them on the phone just brings a smile to my face. Their sweet innocent voices. I have a couple messages from No.ah on my phone and I listen to them at least once a day. When he says "I love you" in his little 2 yr old voice...nothing is better!

Anyway, that is all that has been going on with me. It has been a pretty dreary weekend. I think Fall has officially begun in Michigan. I love Fall but I don't like rainy and dreary.

I hope you all have had a great weekend!