It seems so unfair! My sister and I were pregnant at the same time. It was suppose to be fun! Our kids would grow up together and be close, but then I wasn't. She now has 2 kids. She got pregnant with her second right after my 3rd loss and again we would of had children the same age growing up together. I was pregnant, she was pregnant, then again I wasn't. It's just not right. I keep thinking there should be some kind of limit, I mean I know that sounds stupid but how many times can I mend a broken heart? How many times can I have hope only to have it taken away?
People keep telling me what a strong person I am. How they are amazed considering all I have been through that I can still have a smile on my face. What they don't know is ... I want to be strong...I'm trying to be strong...but I don't feel strong. I want to not let this beat me but the more I fight the harder it gets. It's like everytime I find a way over the wall, someone builds the wall taller. But for now I am going to keep climbing! I will find a way to the other side!
What I really wanted to say was my darling angels, please know that even though you were with me for only a short time, I loved you more then anything and I wish you could be here with me. Your place is in my heart forever but your home is in heaven. I will see you someday, you will always be my babies!
I want to add:
Since, I am new to this whole blog thing I have been reading a lot of other blogs of women, strong women, who are going through this just like me. It's nice to find I am not alone, you are all amazing people and I have found hope and encouragement from each one of you! Keep blogging and I hope to talk to you all soon. What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger!!