Saturday, March 21, 2009

Wow it ICLW already?

ICLW recap:

Me: 35
DH: the most wonderful man I know 42
Married: 8 yrs (together for 15)
Diagnosis: PCOS (it really sucks)
TTC: for almost 9 yrs 4 angels in heaven. 2 early miscarriages and 2 ectopics. 1 ectopic was extremely rare and implanted in my cervix.

If you would like to learn more about me you can read these posts here or here

What is oing on with me:

I can not believe it has been a month already and I am still in the same place I was in last month. Wow that really sucks! I went on Thursday and had a CT scan and got to drink a lovely cocktail of crap just for the occasion. You would think with all the advances today that they could make that contrast stuff taste better. Anyway I should be getting the results sometime next week. So I am still in my cocoon. My DH has been so wonderful taking care of me and doing all the running around. He does it without complaining and anything I ask. I love him so much!

Today is MIL birthday along with my baby nephew No.ah, although I guess I can't call him a baby anymore because he is 2 now. He just still looks so much like a baby and they grow up too fast. Sis is going to have a party for him in April. She is waiting until her knee gets a little better, which I think is a good idea. She has been doing really well since the surgery so that is good news.

I never did go see J new baby yesterday. Which really did not bum me out that much. I feel kind of bad for saying that but my back was hurting really bad after the CT scan and I was just really not in the mood for gushing over babies. Another thing my SIL is having a baby shower on Sunday. Now this is her 2nd child in a few years...Are you suppose to be having a baby shower again for the 2nd one? Now my friend J is having one but it has been 10 yrs since her last child so that is understandable. It has only been a couple for SIL. Anyway, I am not going to that at all. Not my idea of fun. I am sure MIL will be very happy (note sarcasm) about that but I do have back pain and I can't sit for that long. We won't mention I wasn't planning on going even before the back pain started. Again I just do not really feel like gushing over SIL and her 2nd child to a different guy, still unmarried and I believe only 23. The whole thing just makes me want to throw up. With all this baby stuff going on and me being stuck and all I have really been feeling bitter about IF, PCOS, and miscarriages. I am feeling like I don't fit in right now. Anyway I will talk more about that later.

I think spring is on it's way. It is starting to warm up but it is Michigan so you really never know what could happen. We moved the clocks forward last weekend. I love when it stays lighter longer. Anyway, I hope you all have a great weekend! Thank you for all who stop by newbies and regulars. Also thank you so much for leaving a comment...I just love those! Happy ICLW!

23 comments:

strongblonde said...

arg! i totally forgot about iclw! darnit!

dude...it was so cold yesterday! i was upset b/c it was so sunny and beautiful outside, then you walk out to 30 degrees. yuck!!!

Nina said...

I didn't go to my SIL's baby shower either. And I like her better than my brother. She and I were due about 1 week apart. I never saw my nephew till he was 2 months old. I still get weepy for about a week when I see him. I'm still in the angry stage. Hope you feel better soon, and just know you are not alone. ICLW

CJ said...

I don't blame you for not wanting to go to SIL's shower. Yuck! And the second baby in a short time, I agree that ettiquette dictates that she does NOT get another shower anyway.

Melissa said...

what you're describing sounds like this:

http://bottomsoffandonthetable.blogspot.com/2009/03/bfa.html


i SO would not go to that baby shower either. I hope your doc finds something to bring your back relief

Flower said...

I try not to do baby showers... cuz I just end up going home with tears in my eyes. Hugs from one ectopic survivor to another (((hugs)))

JamieD said...

Don't feel bad about missing your SIL's shower - you need to take care of you first.

I am so sorry to hear you are still in your cocoon! I hope you get some relief soon.

Fat Chick said...

I agree with everyone else - it is understandable that you wouldn't want to go to the shower.

I hope you emerge from your cocoon soon! Spring is here, I hope it lifts your spirits!!!

ICLW

Jo said...

I definitely would skip this one. . . .

Nic said...

Happy ICLW! I am so sorry for your loses and your struggle. I understand why you are not going to the baby shower, I wouldn't! Hope everything works out for you

Mrs. Gamgee said...

I agree with all the previous comments about skipping the shower... you are allowed to do what's best for you, even when others may not understand!

ICLW

Stacie said...

Here from ICLW.

I can relate to not wanting to go to the shower. My niece just had a newborn, and I have yet to see the baby. It just hurts too much. And you know what? If she can't understand that, then it is just too bad. Sometimes, I have to think of myself.

ANyway, that was my way of saying you are not alone. Hugs.
Stacie

Lucy said...

Hi there! I would probably do the same for the shower, too! And yea, the conventional etiquette is that you only have a shower for your first, but since no one knows the rules of etiquette any more, so many people do stuff like this. I hope your back feels better, and GL! ICLW

Kischa said...

Don't blame you one bit for the shower! My sister is pregnant with #4 - she's not getting a shower. I told her after a certain number of babies/pregnancies you don't need a shower, you should have everything already! I guess that was mean, but I was having a bad day.

Barefoot said...

Happy ICLW! I hope that you're enjoying the cocoon as much as possible!

iambrowneyedgirl said...

Here through ICLW and I'm looking forward to following on your journey. Wishing you all the luck in the world!

Lori said...

Hey...regular here. But I'm new to ICLW.

Yuck on the cocktail of crap. But you made me laugh!

So glad your DH is so supportive.

Kristen Andrews said...

thanks for stopping by my blog. I agree one shower is enough it is crazy to have more than one!

Missy said...

I don't blame you for not going to the baby shower. It is really hard when we try to be responsible and make plans for a baby but it doesn't happen and others have a baby amidst chaos.

I'm here from ICLW.

Beautiful Mess said...

I hope you back feels better1 I don't blame you one bit for not wanting to gushing all over babies and such right now. You need to do what feels right to you. You're doing the right thing. LAways know that.
*HUGS*
*ICLW*

K said...

I hope you feel better soon
ICLW( i always forget to add that)

MC said...

ICLW -

I hope you feel better soon. And yay on having a fantastic husband!

I don't blame you at all for not going to the SIL's shower. I don't think I'd go either, and I agree thta a baby shower only a few years after your first child is a bit selfish.

~ Katie ~ said...

Thank you for stopping by for my very 1st ICLW. I have to say, I am in agreement with everyone on skipping the baby shower. Hope to see you emerge from you cocoon.

HUGS

Serendipity said...

I so don't blame you for not going to the shower. You need to do what's best for you, not what other people want you to do :)

ICLW