Saturday, February 21, 2009

Welcome to ICLW

So here is a summary of me for all you new readers. I hope anyone stopping by is doing well.

Age: 35 (just turned and not happy about it)
DH: 42
Married: 8 1/2 yrs
TTC: 8 1/2 yrs
Diagnosis: PCOS
Pregnancies: 4
Babies: 0

I have 4 angel babies. 2 were miscarriages between 5-7 weeks and 2 were ectopics. One was an extremely rare ectopic in my cervix. Unfortunately that was the only baby that was doing well and would have been great had it implanted in the correct place. I have tried clomid, injections, and IUI. I am now on break but getting ready to jump back on the horse. I am going to try one more round of injections with some added progesterone that my doctor never had me try before...why I do not know. If that does not work I am going to be pulling out the big guns...IVF. I have not one clue how I am going to pay for it but I HAVE to try.

Lately I have been feeling sad and angry about this whole IF thing and turning 35. I feel like I am not moving forward. I feel I am standing still while the whole world moves on. My last mc was last July and since then I feel I have crossed over into a world I never thought I would be. There is a problem yet there is no one who can tell me how to fix it and makes me sad that there is a possibility that I will never have a baby of my own.

Right now: I am having severe back pain from a probable slipped disk so I have been pretty much laid up in my bed, the couch, or lying on the floor with my feet on the couch as the dr instructed. I finally saw a specialist who gave me some strong pain meds and steroids and is hoping that will help. If not we will be doing an MRI and probably injections. Hopefully I will be feeling better soon because this pain is REALLY BAD!

I can't sit at the computer to long so I am sorry if I am a little bit of a slacker this month. I am still going to try to do all I can I REALLY do not want to break my streak of iron commenter but we will see. It is snowing pretty bad here today but what else is new this year in Michigan. I hope you all have a fabulous weekend and HAPPY ICLW. Thanks for stopping by!

26 comments:

Kahla said...

Oh my, I hope that your back is feeling better very soon! My DH has a slipped disc that gives him problems from time to time and it's pretty awful. Take it easy and I hope your next cycle is the one!

nutmeg96 said...

Hey, thanks for your comment on my blog. I had two losses before we had (relative) success, and every pregnancy was just a roll of the dice (with the odds against us) bc of my jacked-up girl parts. And don't worry about the 35 thing -- it's not like the day you turn 35 your eggs disintegrate. I hope you do keep trying -- it must be your turn soon.

Monica LeMoine said...

Nice to meet you, again! I like the re-introducing yourself aspect of ICLW - getting reminded of your past and present, with some new bits added on. I'm terribly sorry about your back pain. Sounds horrible.

'Murgdan' said...

Ohhhh...I hope you feel better soon! :-(

Andrea said...

I'm so sorry about your losses. I hope your back gets better VERY soon. All the best to you!

ICLW

Billy said...

Thanks for the introduction.
Hope this added progestrone will make the next cycle the winner cycle!
And sorry to hear about your back.
ICLW

michelle said...

I'm sorry for your loses...so hard..
gosh you sound like you are in pain girl...I hope it gets better soon!

stopping in from ICLW

M:)

K said...

Sorry for your losses and I hope that this new year brings new promise.

Rose's Daughter said...

hopeyour back feels better! Good luck on your next cycle.

ICLW

Brenna said...

I appreciate the update for ICLW too! I'm relatively new to this community (not to IF, unfortunately, but to actively blogging about it and following others' journies), so I'm getting caught up on a lot of the back stories. I'm so sorry about your multiple losses. I feel 35 breathing down the back of my neck, and I can sympathize with feeling as though life is passing you by. It's so easy to get caught up in all of this and have our entire lives become about this one thing: having a baby.

I hope the meds get to work on your back pain quickly!

Jo said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your losses. My RE put me on progesterone this time, too -- we have yet to see if it works. I hope it does for you, and hope you are soon pain-free.

Happy ICLW!

sassy said...

Nice to meet you as well, from another IFer.

ICLW

smartypants said...

Wow, what a long journey you have been on. I hope you are able to find what you are looking for in your 35th year.
Good luck with ICLW--i'm never very good at it.
thanks for visiting my blog :)

strongblonde said...

back in the saddle :)

wtf? it's snowing AGAIN here? for the love of all.... can't it just stop already?

Faith said...

Thanks for stopping by the blog and for your sweet comment. I hope your back is feeling much, much better.

Mrs. Square said...

I also like the ICLW introduction, it's a great way for us new readers to get caught up. I am so sorry for your loses. I hope your back feels better soon!

ICLW

Kristin said...

I really hope your back troubles get straightened out rapidly and I wish you the very best of luck with your next cycle. Miscarriages are such a damned hard thing to go through. I hope you never ever have to go through another one.

~ICLW

The Steadfast Warrior said...

Ooo, I really hope your back gets better soon. I really hope this next cycle is the one! I'm on progesterone this time. Don't know it's doing the trick just yet, but we'll find out soon.

Soralis said...

Good luck with your back issues!

Sorry for all your losses... hugs

ICLW

Princess Jo said...

Oh I hope everything settles down for you. I hope you get that baby you search for. Hope lives in the most amazing places.

Jo
(ICLW)

just me said...

I am so sorry for your losses and your current back pain! My journey has been shorter but I have suffered through 3 losses this past year. I hope your back is back to normal soon and that this cycle is yours!
*ICLW*

Cara said...

Oh sweetie - feel better! I know that feeling of not having solutions to obvious a problems. It just sucks.

KimboSue said...

Happy ICLW to you too and I hope this next cycle is the one for you!

littleangelkisses said...

I hope your back is better soon. Thank you for the rundown, it makes it easier to get to know someone. I'm sorry for your losses.

ICLW

Linda

BagMomma said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog. As a fellow sister-in-loss, I know where you are coming from (I've had five losses myself and now doing a DE cycle). It gets downright depressing at times.

Thinking good thoughts for you, and great to meet you via ICLW.

katery said...

thanks for the comment, and good luck to you as well!