Monday, February 9, 2009

100th post - 100 things I have learned through IF

1. It doesn't take just once to get pregnant.
2. All the time and money I spent trying to prevent pregnancy was a big fat waste!
3. Sticking yourself with a needle in the stomach isn't as bad as you would think.
4. It really sucks that I know that.
5. Hoping something is wrong with you just so you have an answer to why you are not getting pregnant is really F**ked up!
6. Being disappointed after getting a report that says everything is fine after doing testing for why I may be having multiple miscarriages is even worse.
7. Spotting during pregnancy is not harmless.
8. Relaxing does NOT make a baby.
9. I CAN"T just "not think about it"...go ahead don't think of a pink elephant right NOW...can't do it.
10. Getting two lines on a pee stick does not mean you will ACTUALLY have a baby.
11. Signing up at every baby related website after getting said BFP is REALLY NOT A GOOD IDEA!
12. You will get things for a baby from those websites FOREVER no matter how much you try to cancel them.
13. Not every RE should be an RE. Some are INSENSITIVE A**holes.
14. Not everyone knows the right thing to say...sometimes they will say completely the WRONG thing.
15. Who are my real friends and will be there though thick and thin.
16. Pregnant women are EVERY WHERE!
17. Someone announcing their pregnancy is not always a happy event.
18. My husband is one of the GREATEST MEN I have ever known!
19. I have lots of blood and do not seem to run out even when they take 15-20 viles of it at a time.
20. My veins suck!!!
21. The hand is a very sensitive place to get blood drawn.
22. I can recognize by sight my ovaries, what is a cyst and what is not, and how thick my lining is without anyone telling me.
23. I could probably do a better job with the dildocam then some of the nurses or "trainees" that are trained to use them.
24. Doctors do not know or think of everything. Be your own advocate!
25. Always have questions written down because when you get into the office it is not an obvious question and you WILL forget.
26. Crying is something I do very well.
27. Sex is not always what it is cracked up to be.
28. You can find ways and places to have sex even in the most dire of circumstances such as being in agony from kidney stones if the timing says it is a must.
29. Money DOES NOT grow on trees.
30. This s**t is expensive!
31. Having a baby is not considered to be a "necessary" life event if you are trying for FMLA.
32. Insurance coverage in Michigan does not require coverage for IVF and that really sucks.
33. I now know what BFN, TTC, 2WW, IVF, OPK, PIO, and many other acronymns stand for.
34. There are a whole lot of people that are experiencing the same thing as me...TOO MANY!
35. Blogging is very therapeutic.
36. I have many friends that I have not met IRL.
37. Things stuck up you vajayjay are not necessarily for pleasure.
38. AF can not take a hint. She is there when you don't want her and no where to be found when you do.
39. Just because I am childless does not mean I have a carefree life and I vacation all over. Quite the opposite.
40. My marriage is strong.
41. The pain of losing your baby never really goes away.
42. Support is very important!
43. I will never take my child for granted.
44. Life is precious!
45. The love a good man and family can make things better.
46. Time goes by VERY FAST!
47. IVF is not just for women who "waited" too long.
48. People will forget you EDD after a mc but you never will.
49. Fake it til you make it!
50. I am a master at peeing in a cup!
51. PCOS sucks!
52. I am a pro at making little graphs
53. Those little graphs just look like a bunch of scribbles (see #51)
54. I know too much about cervical mucus
55. I do things with said cm that no one should ever have to do
56. Have a plan
57. Have a plan B
58. Have a plan C
59. Best laid plans usually turn to crap so you should probably have a plan D, E, and F.
60. Patience is not my strong suit
61. A sense of humor is a must if you are going to go through this.
62. It is ok not to go to every baby shower or kids birthday party.
63. A few shots and I can become a raving hormone filled lunatic.
64. Who am I kidding I can do the above without hormone shots.
65. Birth control pills is not just for those who do NOT want to become pregnant.
66. Metformin is not just for diabetes.
67. If you take metformin you should probably be very close to the bathroom for a good month or so.
68. I can pee alot. For example if I need to take, uh something like 10 or so at home pregnancy tests in an hour just to verify (you never no maybe I just didn't see the 2 lines).
69. Your body can play tricks on you.
70. So can your mind.
71. I can lie to myself pretty well. For example even if I just had a visit from AF I CAN convince myself I am pregnant.
72. I can also convince myself that I have any kind of disease at any time.
73. I am a professional worrier.
74. Everyone knows someone that as soon as they stopped "trying" they became pregnant or at least they have a friend of a friend whose brothers cousins 2nd wifes aunt did, so I am sure it will happen for me.
75. Idiots are every where.
76. But there are a lot more good people (like you all)!
77. "Practice" does not make perfect.
78. Normal every day things can make you think of what you are missing, such as going to the grocery store and passing the baby aisle, and it can ruin your day.
79. I'm crazy.
80. The times I have been pregnant I am always afraid to do things such as move or breath for fear I may dislodge the baby somehow.
81. A lot of good that did me.
82. My dogs and cat are like MY babies.
83. Dogs and cats really DO NOT like if you try to carry them around like a baby.
84. Friendship can come from unexpected places.
85. Sometimes I just need to scream or cry and that IS ok.
86. Maybe if I wait until there is a full moon in the west, and the stars are aligned, and my horoscope says "It's a good day", and it's a Wednesday at precisely 8:02, and on a brisk 52 degree day in May, and I've done all my "practicing", and all my "relaxing", and it's God's will, and the lottery numbers cam up with exactly my birth date, and I made a wish on a star, and threw a penny in the wishing well, and spun around 3 times while hopping on 1 foot, and chanted 10 times "today I WILL make a baby", and then did the deed, and made sure I put pillows under my butt after, then I am sure I WILL get pregnant and have a baby.
87. Hmmm maybe that whole spinning thing while hopping on 1 foot and chanting would work...note to self try this next time.
88. I may look pregnant but really I am not but thanks for asking you brightened my day...whatever...jerk!
89. People have a lot of assvice.
90. Most of the time when people tell me they are pregnant my first thought is...I really hope it lasts...
91. It really sucks that I think that way.
92. There is so much I can do with out kids.
93. That does not make me feel better.
94. The 2ww feels more like a 2 year wait.
95. As soon as you buy the hpt or take the test af usually shows her ugly face.
96. Whenever I do get pregnant and STAY pregnant I am going to be a basket case!
97. I apparently like to make lists.
98. I am a much stronger person then I ever thought I was.
99. All of you out there in blogland make each day easier because of your support and kindness!
100. INFERTILITY REALLY REALLY REALLY SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Shelby said...

Great post! I can relate to almost every item here, especially 100!!

battynurse said...

I can relate to a lot of these too. An interesting one on the blood draws? Most of those tubes they use to draw the blood hold about a teaspoon of blood. So it usually looks like they are taking way more than they are.

Megan said...

I LOVE number 83. hee hee. You made me laugh out loud at work when I'm supposed to be working.

Slice of life said...

Hey there, I think all of them apply to me except we havent quite gone down the IVF route yet.

And then the killer news of the weekend? My SIL is now pregnant with number 2. and after lots of giggling, said 'he only has to look at me and bang'. Oh yeah, does that smart like the dickens.

PCOS does suck. it sucks big time.

I am glad I found your blog. Thanks for sharing

Slice of life said...

20, 26, 35 and 51 fit me perfectly right now as well.

Forgot to say happy birthday. Have a great day today instead!

CJ said...

#95 *always* happens to me. It's like peeing on the stick triggers AF to come an hour later. :P

Cara said...

What a wonderful way to celebrate your purging all the irksome things!

congrats - and hoping your day is right around the corner.

Another Dreamer said...

I feel like I should be yelling, "Amen!" or something :)

Infertility really sucks. And I echo almost every single sentiment you have stated. It really sucks that any of us have come to such realizations, let alone so many of us.

I hope your day is right around the corner as well.

The Steadfast Warrior said...

I LMAO most of my way through this list and at the same time was quieted by how true it all was.
Re: #90- I do the same thing, even to myself right now. :)

Soralis said...

Very true... it stinks that IF becomes such a big part of our lives.


Melissa Griffin said...

That is all I can say - that was soo awesome and ALL true!

Elle said...

What a great list -- full of truths we all wish we didn't know. I particularly like #37. ;)

Dora said...

Great list. I actually had the #9 conversation with someone last week. Only I said purple elephant.

Yes, this SUCKS!!!!!!!!!

Happy belated birthday! (sorry you mom was such a pill.)

Good Egg Hunting said...

Thanks for this v. entertaining and all-too-true list. Happy belated birthday!

chicklet said...

I was going to say I related to x, and y, and z, and then there were just too many I related to so all I can say is I getcha. But #88 in particular gets under my skin. THanks for thinking I'm pregnant, cuz really you just mean I'm fat.Fucker.

In Due Time said...

Love your 100 :-) Happy 100 honey!

And I am *so* jealous of YOUR steady paycheck LOL!


Cassandra said...

Happy 100th! I found myself thinking wistfully about #5 just today.